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it finally happened. i was sitting at my desk sipping coffee. surely just one more christmas cookie couldn't hurt. i took the first bite and the floor below me buckled. with the second bite the floor gave out. amidst a cloud of dry wall and concrete dust, i found myself sitting on the 4th floor. But not for long. the third and final bite again caused the floor to buckle and give, but this time there was no stopping. my weight challenged each floor, pausing briefly on each before falling through to the next.
i grabbed another cookie as i passed through the break room on the 2nd floor.
i waved at the guys in the mail room on the first.
the maintenance man seemed irritated as i passed through the basement.
i sank into the dirt. i saw wolly mammoth bones as i traveled downward through the earth's crust . it seemed to get quite a bit warmer as i passed from the transition zone into the mantle. when i reached the core, my journey to the center of the earth had concluded. i was still seated in my desk chair. looking up through the hole i just created, i could barely see the tiny heads of my co-workers peering down into the hole. i think i heard one say, "serves the fat bastard right".
i was surprised to find i was not alone. seated next to me was jerry lewis. he looked much bigger than i had remembered. he nodded slightly, raised his christmas cookie in a toasting manor and sipped his coffee.
it is going to be a long climb out of this hole i have created for myself.
Posted by griff at December 30, 2002 01:43 PM